19 Apr TMS Made Me Happy Again
On December 23rd, I woke up happy for the first time in over a year!
I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder about 16 years ago. To say it has been struggle is an understatement. I’ve traveled on a very bumpy road that many people, include my friends and even close family members, didn’t know I was on. My ability to act like “all was good in my life” became perfected, and the mask I wore kept me safe. Medication has helped me have some relief. But every 2-3 years my symptoms return and seem to get worse. Losing interest in activities, sleeping 12-14 hours a night, inability to think clearly, memory loss, and hopelessness are some signs that my depression has returned.
For about a year, maybe longer, these symptoms returned and I honestly didn’t know what to do. As I sat in the waiting room for my therapy appointment, I saw a flyer for a treatment called TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation), which is a magnet that stimulates the area of the brain that is inactive. Since my insurance paid for the treatment and I was almost out of options having tried 9 or 10 different antidepressants, I thought why not give it a try. After having 31 treatments since 11/16, I can honestly say that I am happy I feel hopeful again. I have energy. I don’t sleep the weekend away. I know that I’m putting myself out there by telling my story, but I’m so tired of the negative stigma that surrounds mental illness. If sharing my story can help one person, the uncertainty I’m feeling for being so vulnerable is worth it.
Thanks for reading.